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" ... Moreover, active listening includes helping the client hit the nail on the head and not get confused and disorientated by the ambiguity of their own words. But most of all, active listening is all about ditching judgment. It's not a pingpong discussion. Because compassion is key, the client's self-expression isn't subject to criticism of any kind. Sure, we are allowed to have our own opinions and thoughts. But it is also extremely crucial to keep those thoughts silent and within our heads. Otherwise, we will have our own ego raving, and we will have lost connection with what our client needs and wants to say. A coach should speak only 20% of the time, leaving 80% to the client. It's not that we don't care or don't have anything to comment on. It's that we aren't permitted to do so, and, simply, this is not about our beliefs and perceptions. It's all about the client. ... "
" ... Within 15 minutes of our journey, I am already disorientated to the point where he could have blind-folded me and it would have made little difference to my understanding of our whereabouts. In other words, if Botha suddenly had a widowmaker, Connolly and I would become nothing more than a missing persons cold case. ... "